Just reread this, so you can tell I'm not feeling well. I'm too tired to read any of those terrific books with actual substance on my waiting list.
If my brain were working, I could mock up a pseudo-intellectual review. If my brain were working, I wouldn't have just reread this. (I may have mentioned that.) So I'll just point out that this book is exactly what the title says it is. Because you might be under the weather, too, and therefore unable to figure that out for yourself.
Some of my favorite texts from this collection:
Kid: Dad, who do I look like more, you or Mom?
Dad: You look like the hobo who gave you to us.
From Mom: Stop clipping your nails short! How else are they supposed to find your killer's DNA if you are murdered?
Kid: How much does it cost to rent a movie?
Dad: one miiiilllliiiiiooooonnn dollars
Kid: But all of my friends are going! What will I tell them?
Dad: Well, tell them that your parents are bitches.
and, of course:
Mom: Call me!
Mom: It's me, call me!
Mom: Call me ASAP! HELLO?
Mom: I PUSHED YOU OUT OF MY VAGINA BUT YOU'RE TOO DAMN LAZY TO MAKE A PHONE CALL!?!